#1 I would rather die of passion than boredom.- Van Gogh

solution for boredom
9gag

#2 “I’m not creepy, I am limited edition.”

 I deliver pizza for a part time job and see this creep in the window

#3 I am tired of watching politicians screw up this country.-Donald Trump

 The US government deciding which basic human right it's gonna make us beg them to keep every month

#4 You don’t have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body.-C.S.Lewis

What you look like shouldn't matter, It's what's on the inside

#5 I’m actually not funny. I mean it and people think I’m joking.

Not sure what this guy thinks is going to happen at Disney today

#6 The ignorance of one voter in a democracy impairs the security of all.- John F Kennedy

Net neutrality dies 3-2. It's really remarkable how many consequential, society-altering decisions are being decided in closed rooms by single vote margins and with zero consideration of popular or expert opinion. What a healthy democracy we live in.

#7 You inspire my inner serial killer.

 The math works once you remember to factor in that those kicks were fast as lightning

#8 Surely not everybody was Kung Fu fighting.

The math works once you remember to factor in that those kicks were fast as lightning
imgur

#9 When God is playing Jumanji.

We have hurricanes, flooding, wildfires, 2 earthquakes and a tiger loose on 1-75! Which one of you is playing Jumanji?

#10 Playing super smash with your friends.

When everyone selects the same character on super smash.